Bachmann: I was being 'humorous' with disaster remark: USA Today

Ms. Bachmann donned the role of pastor

Said quakes are a sign from our Master

She may be a seer

But one thing is clear

Her comment was a P.R. disaster

Bernanke proposes no new steps to boost economy: LA Times

Big Ben met with his Fed committee

Then spelled out the harsh nitty gritty

Real help I’ll forego

And print no new dough

So Texas will treat me pretty pretty

Libyan rebels: 'It's over, frizz-head': The New Zealand Herald

The rebels stormed Tripoli where they

Searched every last compound for their prey

It’s plain now to see

For Colonel Gaddafi

This is an historic bad hair day

 

Drug Is Found to Extend Lives of Obese Mice: NY Times

Big pharma found a drug with a knack

Fat mice can live longer they did flack

   So if you’re obese

   Your worries can cease

Ditch those carrots for a juicy Big Mac

 

Critics call on Obama to cancel his Martha’s Vineyard vacation: Washington Post

Barak planned some time off to unstress

Which caused cranky critics to obsess

   We hand down this decree

   You should stay in D.C.

To work with the out-of-town Congress

 

Enter Rick Perry, Formidable Fund-Raiser: New York Times

Rick Perry joined the primary race

With a plan to win this grueling chase

   It’s God that he chose

   To vanquish his foes

Still his friends send him cash just in case

 

 

Kanye West Compares Himself to Hitler at British Festival: Rolling Stone

At Big Chill Kanye started to yap

I'm more hated than that Hitler chap

   Blokes who may scoff

   Can all bugger off

It is just one more bloody bad rap

Dow plunges 400, erasing gains for the year: Chicago Tribune

There once was a debt-ceiling fight

Won by the tea party outright

   These cuts we trust

   Will forestall a bust

And for two days they were right